In the Sophomore Essay Trenches

A week from today the first draft of my sophomore essay, a 15 to 20 page paper required by the Honors Program, is due to my adviser. I'll admit that I am not as far into my work as I want to be. The fact that I'm going off-campus this weekend for the religious life retreat (which I am really excited about) means I may be even more behind than I'd hoped. 

Still, I've actually been enjoying working on this essay--much more than most of my homework, anyway! Recently I've been gathering all of my research. I've found some fascinating articles. For my topic, representation of religious doubt in contemporary Young Adult fiction, I've not only been researching religion's role in YA literature but, more generally, conceptions of doubt by religious communities, methods of dealing with doubt, and the role of religion in the lives of teenagers. These articles, coming from the religious rather than literary angle, have been especially interesting to me. A few of them have been about how youth ministry should deal with teenagers questioning their faith. It may be a slight challenge to make the application of these articles clear when talking about YA, but with some effort, I think they can work well.

At the start of the sophomore essay program, students are always encouraged to pick a topic, outside their major or not, that is of interest to them. That's the difference between having a fun, or at least satisfying, experience and the whole thing being a drudgery. I'm really glad that I followed that advice and think that it's true.

Working on this project has made me consider bumping up my religion minor to a major; I would be a double major in Creative Writing and Religion. I don't think I'm going to decide that any time soon, but I'm definitely not ruling out the possibility. College is busy enough as it is, and I'm not so sure I could handle trying to complete the requirements for two programs. However, it is very, very enticing.

Robert Putnam Lecture--Learning About Religion in America

As a religion minor and a religious person, yesterday's lecture by Robert Putnam was definitely of interest to me. Robert Putnam, Harvard professor and author of many books including American Grace: How Religion Divides and Unite Us, was brought to Susquehanna for the annual Alice Pope Shade Lecture. These Shade lectures typically cover the intersection of religion and public life. Putnam's lecture did just this, outline the ways in which religion impacts American social life as well as the changing religious landscape.

Putnam talked a lot about younger people and their views towards the religion. More and more, young people are falling under the category of "nones." This does not mean they are atheist. Many "nones" believe in God and pray regularly. They just do not affiliate themselves with a religion. To put this drastic change in perspective, historical levels of "nones" in America have been 5%. 31% of people under 30 are now classified as "nones."

Putnam looked at some recent history to explain the events. Basically, religion was at an all-time high at the 1950s. Then the 60s came along and there was tremendous social shifting, especially regarding sexual norms. Another group in the 70s and 80s didn't find this liberating but appalling and swung towards evangelical Protestantism. This conservative group became increasing politicized so that, now, religion often becomes identified with conservative Republican politics. A backlash against this began in 1990, with "nones" steadily increasing.

According to Putnam, this dramatic shift by younger people away from organized religion will certainly impact American public life.

I think it's always interesting to realize that you, in the present, are inside a time of history and change. This current trend away from organized religion didn't start long before I was born--it's so recent, really--but I've been living in it my entire life. It's become defining to my generation. Where we go from here is unknown, but it will alter America, maybe forever.

During the Q&A, Putnam brought up that he didn't think young people were going to change but religious offerings would. He believes that there is a large pool of people who would go to church if they didn't think that mean being Republican or homophobic; I have witnessed these conceptions and think this is true. Putnam predicts that a church may adapt to attract them--a contemporary one that is not necessarily liberal but at least apolitical, one that focuses less on issues of sex.

If Putnam is right, that means the future I'll inhabit will have a very different religious landscape than the one I've seen growing up. Or maybe the religious offerings won't adapt and "nones" will continue their rise. We simply don't know. I may have certain hopes about what might happen, but whatever does happen, Putnam suggests that America will be changed for it--as well as American democracy. This lecture made me mull over those hopes and the ramifications my generation, and the decades to come, may have.

Short Shorts--Being Challenged As A Writer

When it comes to writing, I would identify myself as a novelist. I love to write longer pieces and can find the idea of writing fewer pages to be stifling. I tend to turn in lengthier pieces than many of my classmates--and those pieces still often beg for more pages. This has been a challenge since both Intro to Fiction and Intermediate Fiction courses are focused on short stories.

In Intermediate Fiction, my tendencies are challenged even more by "short short" assignments. Short shorts can be no more than four, double-spaced pages long. And yet they have to contain so much--or at least, contain very little done very well. Rather than having full-scale workshops, where the entire classes discusses the piece, we break into groups of four people and go over each person's work more informally.

I used my first short short as a chance to experiment. The experiment failed--at least judging by the feedback I received.

Today I have to e-mail out my newest short short to a different small group of students. This piece is a bit more conventional--also, I'm hoping, a bit better. I am both excited and nervous about hearing their feedback. I feel as if I understood short shorts more when writing this one. In my previous short short, I crammed in a lot of different scenes but this piece is more focused on a particular moment.

While I don't see myself abandoning my novelist aspirations to crank out short short anthologies, I definitely see that I'm being stretched as a writer by these activities--and surprisingly enough, I've actually enjoyed writing these short shorts, even if they may not be my best work.

A Future Alumna

For my work in University Communications, I am writing an article on the 15th anniversary  of the Creative Writing major. A significant portion of the research for this article was looking at alumni and their successes in Creative Writing, as well as their uses of the study in unrelated fields. As a Creative Writing major, I can't stop myself from wondering where I might fall among Creative Writing graduates in the future. Of course, I hope I'd be one of those better-known alumni in the program who is getting published and being invited back to read, but even those alumni have other jobs--other significant portions of their lives. I have the feeling for that many Creative Writing major alumni, their paths aren't always the most planned out, but I'm thinking that's probably common among college graduates.

Perhaps, by the time I'm graduating, I'll want to pursue an M.F.A., though I don't find that thought appealing now.

I've talked about my interest in a library career here before, and that interest is still there, though I don't want to go straight into a graduate program for library science. Grad school is a big commitment, and don't even get me started on issues of affordability! Maybe after graduation I'll have a chance to work in libraries to see if that's really what I want to pursue. Right now I keep kicking around the idea of being an academic librarian and working in a university setting. Even within the "academic librarian" field, there are many routes to take.

Maybe I will work in a communications-oriented job after I graduate. Or maybe I'll be in something that would seem totally out-there and irrelevant now. The main thing, however, is that I want to be writing, no matter what my job title may be. I hope that a few years out from graduation I'm beginning to accomplish what I want as a writer--particularly, that I'm publishing a YA novel--but even if I haven't been met with quick success, I hope Megan the alumna is still working towards it. I believe she will be.

Homecoming: Sophomore Version

My thrift store Homecoming dress

This year's Homecoming weekend was much earlier than last year's. Like last year, I didn't become too involved in the Homecoming festivities. I had a busy Saturday and missed the parade, and I will admit to having zero interest in the football game. I did, however, attend the Homecoming semi-formal. I came later, just missing the announcement of the Homecoming court. The semi-formal was a far cry from the rave I had attended the weekend before. Besides the apparel being much different, it also became far less crowded as the night progressed. The vibe was a lot less crazy and a lot more chill. I hadn't been too enthusiastic about going out that Friday evening, but once I was there and got into dancing, I had a great time.

Earlier on Friday, I went to a service project with Alpha Phi Omega. This was a YMCA dance for kindergarten through third graders. It was interesting to hear some of the same songs played both there and at TRAX! The children were very cute (and deeply divided on the issue of Justin Bieber), and I'll admit it made me a bit wistful for childhood.

On Saturday, I attended an alumni reading located in the campus's art gallery, in the midst of the ceramic exhibit. All the writers were very talented. I particularly enjoyed the essay shared by Jay Varner, who has published a memoir, and a novel prologue by another one of the writers.

Sunday, the chapel service was larger than usual because of alumni being around for Homecoming weekend. For this reason, they needed extra ushers. I served as one for the first time. This mainly involved handing out programs, passing around the collection plate, and dismissing people for communion. I was a bit nervous about messing something up, but it all went pretty smoothly!

Though Homecoming was definitely a much bigger deal for others than it was for me--particularly alumni, who this weekend is really about--it clearly contributed my weekend in many ways. Perhaps next year will be the year when I fully immerse myself in that Crusader spirit.

Class Overview

Since I’m now about three weeks through this first semester, I figure I’ve had enough time in my classes to give an overview of them and my thoughts on them so far. 

Sophomore Essay does not meet every week, though we’ll start getting together frequently later in the semester to do practice presentations. Right now, everyone is working on their sophomore essays independently and meeting with their advisers as needed. As a part of the Sophomore Essay class, each student has a meeting with university librarian Kathleen Dalton. Mine was this Monday. She definitely helped me find databases and some articles to use in my essay. I desperately need to carve out a chunk of time this weekend to dive into my research and map out my first draft which is due in the beginning of October.

English Writing & Grammar is a course I have on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. So far it seems to be a lot that I know already. We have a paper coming up soon, and we have some freedom to choose our focus. In mine, I want to analyze a Skype chatroom I have with some of my friends at Susquehanna.

My other Monday/Wednesday/Friday course is Thought & the Natural Sciences, which includes a lab. I’ll admit that this course makes me the most nervous. I am not the best at hands-on learning or even understanding scientific concepts. Thankfully, this course fulfills the scientific requirement in the Central Curriculum once and for all. A lab we just completed was designing and shooting off a rocket. My lab team, the Chinchillas, had two successful launches. Unfortunately, this success was accompanied with sunburn. 

Tuesday and Thursday mornings I have Intermediate Fiction. I’ve already had my first short story workshopped, and yesterday in class we got into small groups to discuss each other’s short-short (4 pages or less) fiction. This is one of my favorite courses, and it’s got me back to that mindset where I just want to write all the time—rather than do other, more unpleasant homework.

In the afternoons I have The Hebrew Bible, which is very interesting and will go towards my Religion and  Honors Program minors. So far we’ve learned about the geography, storyline, translation issues, and reading methods of the Hebrew Bible, and we’ve started a unit on identity, looking at the ambiguity of Moses and the makeup of the biblical family. As someone who is involved in religious life, it is interesting and enriching to look at religion and a part of the Bible from an academic perspective. I had Dr. Bohmbach, the professor of this course, for another class last year, Applied Biblical Ethics, which I really enjoyed. 

Mostly these courses just mean a lot of reading. Some of it is very interesting. Some of it...not so much. But I suppose that's college!   

Back to What?

Coming back to Susquehanna was very exciting, but I think I need to make it clear, to both my readers and myself, that coming back to Susquehanna is exactly that: coming back to Susquehanna. I didn’t come back to my freshman year, to Hassinger Hall, or to a top bunk. I didn’t come back to pick things up as they left off—not exactly. This year is new.

My room this year--before it got messy!

Not as new as coming into Susquehanna as a nervous freshman wondering what college will entail.

But still new. New enough that I am curious to see where this year takes me. New enough , even though I’m familiar with my friends, this campus, and the routine of work and classes,  that it’s taking a bit of adjustment to get back into the swing of things.

Or more accurately, to start a new swing of things.

Something I have to tackle this year is how to maintain and balance friendships with people who I used to live with but now don’t get to see on that same, day-to-day basis.  Only a certain set of my friends have that same right-down-the-hall status. Also, I’m still acclimating  to living alone. I definitely need to work out a cleaning routine because, without a roommate to consider, I’ve let things get a bit disheveled. Clearly, this isn’t the biggest issue with living alone, but it’s something I should probably work on!   

In another entry, I talked about how being a sophomore was good because I had a comfort zone from which to start. That’s still true. However, that comfort zone has had to shift and budge a little. It’s been altered—it’s been pinched by some discomforts, forces of change. Discomfort isn’t a negative, though.  No year can be the same as the one before. And next year I may, all over again, be contemplating on how to adapt to the changes of a different academic year.

 I’ll admit that, right now, I have a bit of nostalgic longing for my freshman year. I see people enter Hassinger—people that aren’t me—and go a bit gooey on the inside. Facebook shows me status updates from “this day in 2010,” and I relive that fresh, exciting period of time where I was just really discovering and getting to know the friends I have now.

I’m hoping that next year my time as a sophomore will elicit the same feelings.